I don’t have a lot of “rules” when it comes to the world of Spirits, and interacting with them but I do have three key rules that are worth mentioning:
Not all gods give good gifts.
Not all that is dead is wise.
Food & drink beneath the Mound is not for you.
That last one comes from folklore and myth: we should all know, I hope, of the stories told about those who have accepted the sustenance of the Otherworld, and what this has meant: from Hades and Persephone to Rip Van Winkle, the accepting of food or drink is sure to bind you to a space outside of time.
The notion that “not all that is dead is wise” is supported by myth, as well: when Odysseus seeks information from the dead in the nekyia, he seeks out a specific seer, Tiresias, rather than asking any dead guy he meets for information. Tiresias has the information he seeks not because he has gained some wisdom from being dead, but because he was a wise seer in life. Not all Spirits offer wisdom, though they may say they do.
“Not all gods give good gifts” is possibly the most controversial “rule” here, because we live in a space where the predominant culture is monotheistic, and where one should “trust” their deities to engage in platitudes. For reference, the gods of polytheists (and spirits in general) do not subscribe to these common monotheistic statements:
God will only give you what you can handle.
Everything happens for a reason.
God will provide the means to accomplish the task set before you.
God open a window when He shuts a door.
Give yourself over to God and He will take care of you.
God will always hear you.
God has a plan.
This isn’t meant to imply that our gods are somehow less than an omnipotent god of the universe, but our gods are not omnipotent, omniscient, or omnipresent. They are, like us, imperfect. Which, frankly, given how much weirdness there is in the world, I find far more comforting than the notion that there’s some puppetmaster out there with a plan.
But sometimes, gods and spirits will put a task before you that is too much to accomplish. Sometimes, they will give you more than you can handle. Sometimes, they will not be able to take care of you. Sometimes, they don’t have anything remotely resembling a plan.
And that’s okay.
If a god or spirit offers you too much to handle, or seems ill-prepared to manage your situation, the beauty of polytheism becomes apparent when you realize you can appeal to someone else to pick up the slack.
You’re not “stuck” with a spirit who has a plan you disagree with. You can firmly set boundaries with that deity who asks too much of you or infringes on your personal notion of safety and security. You can take care of yourself without feeling guilt for doing so if the deity you want to work with cannot or will not do it for you.
But the key is this: you don’t have to take whatever a deity throws at you lying down. You have agency, the ability to form more favorable relationships, and, perhaps most importantly, you have the ability to refuse any “gift” from any spirit you wish.
So, make alliances, do the work, and do it all with confidence. Don’t feel like you are obligated to accept gifts, advice, or food: you’re a powerful individual with agency, to. Work as if you are.
